Lying, the secret to being funny.

When you hear about what a woman is looking for in a man an almost universal appetite is that of a "sense of humour".

I don't quite know how you could define "sense of humour". I think you'd be pretty hard pressed to find someone who doesn't laugh. I don't know, maybe I am blessed to hang around with an unnaturally high percentage of people who find things funny, but in general, even the least amusing of my friends enjoy comedy. We aren't German.

So why is it then that "sense of humour" is such a highly valued personality trait?

I was asked in a recent job interview, which the more mean-spirited amongst you will be pleased to know I was rejected for, "what is your sense of humour like?"
Now, I don't think there is a sensible way to answer that question without sounding like you don't have a sense of humour.

"What is your sense of humour like?"
A) "I have a sense of humour" No.
B) "I have a mastery of the comedic wit" No.
C) "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAH" No.
D) "Excellent." No.
E) "What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? A erection" No.
F) "My friends say I should do stand-up, but I just say what I think" NO. No you pretencions dick.

I tried an equally unfunny way of proving that I had a sense of humour but, in a case of impressive irony, it's not really funny or interesting enough for me to bother to write it here.

Clearly, then, proving you have a sense of humour is difficult.

However, if stand-up comedians have taught us anything, it's that it doesn't matter if you're not actually funny naturally, you just have to be a decent liar.

Real life, you see, is rarely funny. And certainly not in the sense that re-telling it might be funny. That's why we have the phrase "you had to be there", to save us from when it turns out that the funny thing that happened to us, actually was blank-face-ingly dull.

There are so many obviously made up stories that comedians tell, it gets actually pretty uncomfortable and embarrassing to listen to.

I recall Russell Howard thrilling a Mock The Week audience with a tale of how "his mate Dave" once said to him, without any humour, that "those vuvuzelas are so loud they could kill a monkey".
It got a laugh, annoyingly.

Now, either three things are possible here:

1) Russell has just made up that story, because it's mildly funny to imagine someone being so STUPID they would believe that the loudness of a vuvuzela would kill a monkey.

2) In reality, Dave had made this comment, perhaps as one of those ridiculous moments you have with your friends, and said it to make them laugh. The quote therefore was out of context, and was pretty much a lie.

3) Russell Howard hangs around with genuine idiots.

I would say that one or two is definitely the most likely.

So we can see that Russell Howard was paid good money by the BBC to lie.

Because as the old adage goes: it's funny because it's true.
Except it almost certainly is not.