Religion.

I was thinking the other, "I often give religion a hard time, too hard, perhaps".

But I don't. I very much fucking don't.

I would like to believe in an afterlife, or a "reason to exist" beyond what we would call conventional human interaction and lifestyle, but any time I begin to question my own attitude towards religion, I am always brought back to the same, challenging issue; it's all a load of crap.

I'll use the Christian religion as my primary example, mainly because it is the one that I have thrust upon me most often. Now, Christianity more or less says: live a good life and go to Heaven, live a bad life and go to Hell. There are various complications and debates mainly to do with shellfish and gays, but essentially, as long as you're a good person and do everything God told us to do in the Bible you will spend eternity in the blissful joy of Heaven.
Do a few bad things here and there, sin a little, and don't repent, and I'm sorry my friend, but the punishment for your insignificant indiscretions is eternity (yes, that's right, infinity years, never ending) torture and agony in Hell.

Seriously? That's what Christians believe happens. 80-odd years of living on Earth somehow translates to a limitless number of years either in agony or bliss. No middle ground at all?
Un-baptised/un-christened children who (God forbid [EPIC IRONY]) get hit by a car, also go to hell. They didn't get a fair chance! They might have been utterly perfect, loving people, but no, we'll never know. They might have stolen some sweeties too. Eternity in Hell for them, just in case.

What about all those humans who were around before Jesus was born and spread the good message of God. God fucked them over! He didn't give them a chance. These days Americans have televangelists ten-a-penny shouting at them to put their faith in the Almighty Savior, but they got nothing. No-one told them what was going to happen.
Hell for them.

And what about all the remote tribes in Africa who had never heard of Jesus. They got a fucking shock when they found themselves at the fiery gates of hell about to enjoy millennia upon millennia of unendurable pain.
"Sorry," says God "I was a bit busy running the universe to let you guys know about Hell and that. LOL"

The worst thing about religion for me, though, is it isn't giving you any answers. You hear people say "well, science can't explain how the universe began". Sure there was the Big Bang, but what did the Big Bang come from? Christianity sidles up next to you and gives you the very compelling "God did it".
But that's it. It doesn't actually explain anything at all. Where did God come from? He wasn't always there, that is an impossibility, something had to have been there before God, and then you are just back to the same problem.
Christianity hasn't given you an answer at all, it has just distracted you whilst it made the question impossible to answer.

The final annoyance, however, is that no matter what, even if I'm right (and I am) I'm not going to be able to gloat about it. I wont be able to line up all the religious people in front of me and say "HA, I WAS FUCKING RIGHT ALL ALONG AND YOU IDIOTS BELIEVED IN A GOD THAT WASN'T THERE".
I wont get that pleasure.
There are two options. Either I'm right, and when we die it's just like being asleep, only you never wake up (but you'll never have to worry about it because you'll be dead). Or! The religious people are actually right. And then they will be able to rub it in my face, probably simultaneously as I am being tortured in the pits of Hell for all of time.

It's no fun either way.

The last point I make is with regret. Because in all honesty, I don't think the world would be a better place without religion. In my experience of Christians they tend to be kind, loving, generous people with good morals and values. In short, the kind of people I wish the world was made up of.
I wish that instead people were just Humanist, and applied those good morals and values, like courtesy, and kindness, and compassion, and politeness, without having to think that we should deserve a reward for it at the end. That is just how we should be, not what a God wants us to be.